Are you desiring marriage for personal fulfillment or to fulfill God’s purpose?
It’s easy to allow the desire for a partner to consume you in a society that over emphasizes companionship, leaving one to feel overwhelmed and discontent. There is absolutely nothing wrong with desiring marriage. This is a natural desire, and I believe the Lord created man for companionship (Genesis 2:18). The issue comes when the pressure of society leads one to feel insecure, and anxious to find a partner. This pressure and insecurity can lead one to step outside of God’s leading and search for their ideal mate, one that may not be God’s best for them.
What’s wrong with finding a mate on my own? Well, when God is your source why would you want to? I have discovered that my life is no longer my own. Each day I give my will to the Lord. With that being said, I freely allow the Lord to take the lead in materializing my mate. Materializing my mate, that’s catchy! This simply means I allow God’s will to be done in the process, and timing of me meeting Mr. Right for Me, and during this time the urgency to fulfill my marital need subsides because I trust in the Lord and believe that it’s going to work out for my good (Romans 8:28).
How do you get to the place where you trust Gods timing for a mate, especially when that means you have to WAIT? Here are some key tips! Developing a strong relationship with the Lord first is the key to sustaining and healthy and loving relationship with anyone (Psalms 37:4). Using marriage to fulfill our needs is superficial and only provides temporary satisfaction. We were distinctively created to serve God first, so if we aren’t tapping into the source, we won’t be fulfilled in marriage. The key is to get so caught up in Jesus that we aren’t consumed with the world’s desires and pressures. Does this seem unrealistic to you? Well, it’s possible and freeing if you’re willing to try.
The Take Away…
- Give your will to the Lord daily (Hebrews 13: 20-21).
- Allow God to materialize your mate (Matthew 6:33).
- Get caught up in Jesus (Deuteronomy 6:5).
Check Your Motives:
- Can I trust God to materialize my mate?
- Can I trust in His ultimate plan even if this takes time to produce?
Until next time…
Denetra Gary, LCSW-C